Quote:
Originally Posted by ufaq
Aadab zarra sahib.....jis khoobsurati se aapne tarahi misre me'n misra lagaaya hai.....tarahi misra aapka ho gayaa hai.....aur sach maaniye ye koi kam badi baat nahi hai......aapko is naayab kaamyaabi pe dhero daad......Bas ek baat kahana chaahata hu. Agar aap bura na samjhe.....doosre sher me'n >kis< lafz ki takraar maza kharaab kar rahii hai....ho sake to thoda is simt ghaur farmaaiyega....kahi'n chaa'nd me'n koi daagh na rah jaaye......tc
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Aadaab Ufaq sahab .... aap ki inayat ki aap ne is ghazal ko itna pasand kiya ... aap ki mohabbat bhari daad ka tah e dil se mashqoor hoon ... bahaut shukriya ki aapne apni raiy zahir ki doosre sher ke mutalliq ... ye bhi aap ki mohabbat hi hai jis meiN mere fayde ka hi andesha hai... waise maine "kis" ki takraar dali thi sher meiN ek pech o kham daalne ki koshish meiN
... lekin aap ka kehna bhi sahi hai ke sher ka maza bhi kharaab bhi kar sakti hai ... Lekin waise bhi main misra e oola se pooree tarah mutmain naheen tha kyunki lag raha tha ke mazmoon pooree tarah khul naheen raha hai ... to use maine kuchh is tarah tabdeel kar diya hai ...
ho raha sood-o-ziyaaN* meiN zeest* ka meree hisaab
kis tarah mere janaaze ko kareiN baazaar log
is tarah "kis" ki takraar bhi naheen rehti
ek baar phir aap ka shukriya aap ke saath ka .. Duaon ke saath ...zarraa