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बेवफाई |
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(#1)
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Registered User
 
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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बेवफाई -
9th November 2009, 11:18 AM
दिल देकर हमने तो, बस तन्हाई ही पायी है !
अब उससे क्या शिकवा करना, जिसकी फिदरत ही बेवफाई है !! (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#2)
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Aapki dost
 
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Posts: 7,325
Join Date: Feb 2008
Rep Power: 57
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9th November 2009, 11:28 AM
Dil dekar humne to,bas tanhaayi hi paayi hai,
Ab usse kya shikwa karna,jiski fitrat hi bewafaii hai nice one neha........do post in roman hindi as well, so that everybody can read it................  Zainy PalkoN ki baand ko tod ke daaman pe aa gira Ek aaNsu mere zabt ki tauheen kar gaya... Nm |
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(#3)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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9th November 2009, 11:35 AM
ji zainy ji bilkil....
abhi tak SDC se anjane hai aap yuhi hamara sath dijiye.. me bhi yaha new hu to apka sath chahugi... (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#4)
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Registered User
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Posts: 1,849
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Mumbai
Rep Power: 32
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9th November 2009, 12:39 PM
Nice lines Neha.....koshish kare ke kam se kam 4 sher ho it will help you build confidence in your work. ( Just my personal Suggestion nothing serious. )
Take care.. Par tujhe bevafa bhi kehna achcha nahi lagta... Mob.: +971 501297654
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(#5)
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Anshumali
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Posts: 7,420
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: DELHI (INDIA)
Rep Power: 87
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9th November 2009, 01:25 PM
Quote:
aapke intro se pata chalta hai........aapke paas soch aur ehsaas ache hai......aap likhte rahiye... khush rahiye... duaaon ke saath...  YuuN Besabab Aansoo Aate NahiN Lag Zaroor Koii Baat Dil Ko Rahii Hai ... Fareb Kaa ChaDhtaa Bazaar Dekh Insaaf Se Bastii Khaalii Ho Rahii Hai ... ---Naresh Mehra---- |
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(#6)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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9th November 2009, 02:50 PM
thnx sajid ji and naresh ji...... koshish jari hai isse edit jarur karungi bas busy schedule me se jo waqt milte hai wo aap logo se sath hi bitau yahi sochkar me yaha aayi hu ............... ab jald hi apke aage bahut si soch rakhungi apni
(๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#7)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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11th November 2009, 02:54 PM
thnx u naresh jee.... me koshish karti hu or karti rahungi bas aap sabhi ka sath milta rahe
(๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#8)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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16th November 2009, 04:43 PM
Bewafaiii me 2 lines or add ki hai ummeed karti hu ki SDC ke sabhi dosto ko pasand aayegi
Dil dekar hamne to tanhaii hi payi hai... Ab usse kya shikwa karna jiski fidrat hi bewafaii hai.. Khud khuda ne hi to ye khudaii banayi hai.. Pyar karne walo ke naseeb me hi judaii banayi hai...... (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#9)
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Paigaam-e-Aman
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Posts: 2,689
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Patiala, Punjab, India. Now:Pune, India
Rep Power: 26
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16th November 2009, 08:02 PM
Neha ji... Adaab, Namaskaar, Sat Sri Akal.........
aapke ehsaason mein ek dard hai....likhne ki chah hai... koshish hai...... likhte rahiye............ **(*·.¸(`·.¸ ¸.·´)¸.·*)** *·.¸Paigaam -e- Aman¸.·* **(¸.·´(¸.·* *·.¸)`·.¸)** ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* inhan ankhaaon vicho kadi, tere hanju vaghe si..... aaj ki hoye, jehda ^AMAN^ da lahoo vagda ae...... AMAN RAHI |
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(#10)
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anant
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Posts: 59
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: churu,rajasthan
Rep Power: 16
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16th November 2009, 09:45 PM
Quote:
ye humari traf se aap ke liye...... ashko ki khani labo se baya.n ho nahi sakti, isq me kabhi wo bewafa ho nahi sakti, uski bhi koi majburi rahi hogi bhula dene ki humko, judai ke dard se wo bhi juda nahi hogi............. |
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(#11)
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Moderator
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Posts: 15,199
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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17th November 2009, 09:40 AM
Dear Neha..............hume aapki yeh 4 liner poetry acchi lagi.....ahsaas umda haiN koshish karte raho....hume aapki har koshish pasand aa rahi hai aur haaN hum ZAINY ke sujao se sahmat haiN.....keep it up.
god bless u .....Sunita Thakur..... यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया ....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए... 
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(#12)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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19th November 2009, 11:07 AM
Quote:
thanks aman G..... aapko meri koshish pasand aayi..... (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#13)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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19th November 2009, 11:08 AM
Quote:
thanks anant G ............ aapne isse pasand kiya.... (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#14)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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19th November 2009, 11:10 AM
Quote:
thnx u sunita G.... aapko meri koshish pasand aayi... mere liye yahi bahut badi baat hai.... (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#15)
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An Incomplite Dream
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Posts: 3,017
Join Date: Mar 2009
Rep Power: 30
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19th November 2009, 03:56 PM
Quote:
Aapne char line bahut khoob likhi hai aapke ahsaas bahut dard bhare lagte hai amazing... Paheli line likhe koi aur woh bhi dard bhare sach mein kamal laga... Aapki lekhani mein bahut jaldi kamal aayenga. aap thode likhane ke andaaz se nawakif hai... Dheere dheere samajh jayengii... Keep writting Keep posting..... God Bless you... 
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(#16)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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20th November 2009, 01:24 PM
Quote:
thnx u khwaish Jee ki aapko meri lekhni pasand aayi... aapne sach kaha me likhane ke andaaz se wakif to nahi hu par kya karu apne dard ko apne alfaazooo me likh to deti hu .... bas us dard ko mahsoos karne wale usse samjh lete hai.... baki............... kuch nahi................... thnx u so much (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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(#17)
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DIL KI BAAT DIL TAK
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Posts: 1,185
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MORADABAD (U.P.)
Rep Power: 37
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20th November 2009, 01:37 PM
Quote:
Bahut gehri baat kehdi aapne kam alfazo mein isi pe aur koshish kare ise aur mukammal karsakti hai.n aap accha lagega aapko padhna kunki ehssas acche hain. lekin ek baat aapne likha hai 'Fidrat' aur sahi alfaz 'Fitrat' hai to thoda clear kare unhi likhti rahe khush Rahe.....T.C. Dunia ke sitam ki koi perwah nahi mujhko, wo kyoun mujhpe ungliya uthaye ja rahe hain. Jis shaks ko janta tha ek chehre se ''kashif'' Uske kitne chehre samne laye ja rahe hain.  |
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(#18)
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Registered User
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Posts: 155
Join Date: Nov 2009
Rep Power: 16
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20th November 2009, 01:43 PM
Quote:
shukriya kashif G .......... mere alfaaj jaha jaha bigde ummeed karungi aap unhe yuhi thi karte rahenge ... nyways... mene in do lines ke bad do lines or add ki thi ... aap is thread ko chk kijiye 16th nov 09 ki post hai meri issi thread me (๏̯͡๏) (๏̯͡๏) Hasratein dilo ki chupaye nahi chupti hai, dard juba par bankar bayan sab karti hai..... ***************************** Dard ki mehfil me ek sher hum bhi aarz kiya karte hai.. Na kisi se marham Na duaon ki Ummed kiya karte hai.. kayi chehre lekar log yaha jiya karte hai....... hum in aasunao ko ek chehre ke liye peeya karte hai.... |
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