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tumnay na jaanay kaisa jadoo kiya
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Ankita
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Cool tumnay na jaanay kaisa jadoo kiya - 2nd September 2011, 11:25 AM

tumnay na jaanay kaisa jadoo kiya
umr kay har padaav say guzar gaye

tumhari chahat tumhari ankhain dekhi
jindagi ki har jung say jeet gaye

tumhara ehsaas sochtay tanhaii mein bhi
kadamon kay tumharay nishaan pehchaantay gaye

ek pal jo thehray toh jaana sanam
tumhari "archana" mein hum sanwar gaye...
A
   
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Ajnabi
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Thumbs up 4th September 2011, 12:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ankita View Post
tumnay na jaanay kaisa jadoo kiya
umr kay har padaav say guzar gaye

tumhari chahat tumhari ankhain dekhi
jindagi ki har jung say jeet gaye

tumhara ehsaas sochtay tanhaii mein bhi
kadamon kay tumharay nishaan pehchaantay gaye

ek pal jo thehray toh jaana sanam
tumhari "archana" mein hum sanwar gaye...
A
Good effort Ankita G! Aisa laage ha tussi ek free wheeling poetess ho...who cares more about the expression than about the rules...in one sense its alright! Good emotions and expressions!


Honaa Hai Fenaah Yaad Rakh Aye Shams Tujhko Bhi,
Is Kehkashaan Mein Mai He Nahi Waahid Shaye Faanee!


Ajnabi
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Ankita
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Cool 11th September 2011, 02:29 AM

namaste ajnabi ji,

aap pehlay insaan hain jin ko is baat ka ehsaas hua ki I pay more attention to expressions then rules.

I find sometimes the rules restrict you from expressing what you feel.

What do you say?

Anyway thanks for encouring me.

Regards,
A
   
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Ankita
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Cool 11th September 2011, 02:32 AM

jeenay ki har chaah ko seekh gaye
dharti akaash mein milan paa gaye
ek ehsaas ka akaah hai woh tum ho
ek dharti ka padaav hai woh hum hain
milan toh hona hi hai tera aur mera
mat puch ki kab, woh waqt ho tum ho
   
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sunita thakur
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12th September 2011, 10:41 PM

ahsaas acche lage jiii.......................................!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


.....Sunita Thakur.....

यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...


   
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Ankita
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Cool 22nd September 2011, 03:42 PM

Thank you Sunita ji. aap ki tasveer bahut pasand aayi.
Regards,
A
   
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sameer'shaad'
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24th September 2011, 09:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ankita View Post
namaste ajnabi ji,

aap pehlay insaan hain jin ko is baat ka ehsaas hua ki I pay more attention to expressions then rules.

I find sometimes the rules restrict you from expressing what you feel.

What do you say?

Anyway thanks for encouring me.

Regards,
A
Aur main Doosraa.. Mujhe aapki ye adaa bahot pasand aai Ankitaa.. padhaa to aapko wese pahle bhi kai baar hai aur har baar yahi khayaal aaata tha ke jaise ye Expressions itne khooob hain agar sahi maayne me inhe sheroN me dhaala jaaae to kamaal ki ghazal bane.. its my suggestion dear try to learn technical now and put your efforts in correct directions.. so that it would bloom like anything... My best wishes always with you... For any help we are always with you... Then go ahead and grab your destiny.... All the very best..
Shaad


Shaad...
   
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Rohin
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24th September 2011, 11:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ankita View Post
tumnay na jaanay kaisa jadoo kiya
umr kay har padaav say guzar gaye

tumhari chahat tumhari ankhain dekhi
jindagi ki har jung say jeet gaye

tumhara ehsaas sochtay tanhaii mein bhi
kadamon kay tumharay nishaan pehchaantay gaye

ek pal jo thehray toh jaana sanam
tumhari "archana" mein hum sanwar gaye...
A
It is important that you feel first... rules and writing skills can be practiced and honed... but feelings cannot be... write your first draft spontaneously and go away from it for maybe a couple of days... come back and look at it and read it... if you can pick up the feeling from where you left off a couple of days ago... you have done a good job...

The spark is there... so keep it up


http://www.thoughtsunbound.com a place for my thoughts
   
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Ankita
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Cool 14th October 2011, 11:58 AM

Sameer Sahab,

aap nay likha grab your destiny yaanikay - takdeer or maybe manzil.

chal toh paday thay manzil ki talash mein
par dekha har raah par sab saath ho liye

mein toh hoon ab bhi safar mein manzil ki
tumnay jo kaha toh dam bhar thahar liye...
A

woh kya janay hota hai kya khula asmaan
pyar ka pinjara bhi na mil paya jisay
   
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Ankita
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Cool 14th October 2011, 12:00 PM

ehsaason kay jungle mein chingaari hai
yeh kaisay kismat usnay likh daali hai...
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Ankita
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Cool 14th October 2011, 12:01 PM

meri chahat ka nasha kuch aisay badha hai
hum kadam bhi dekho bahaknay laga hai...

jhoom kar ghiri hai ghata kaali matwaali
yeh bijli hai pagali dil say khelnay waali...
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16th October 2011, 01:00 PM

badhiya hai... yuhi likhti rahiye...pyaar mein doobi rahiye
   
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