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Khud Ke Liye Maatam Mana Rahi Hu..!!!
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Khud Ke Liye Maatam Mana Rahi Hu..!!! - 16th December 2005, 01:09 PM

Apno Ne Nahi,Humein Gairon Ne Zakhm Diya Karte Hain,
Phir Bhi Chere pe Tabassum Liye,Une hasane Ki Khosis Karte Hain.

Mana Ke Humein Shabdon Se Khelna nahin Aata hai,ise Aiteraz kyun Hain.
Yun Jhooti Dosti Nibhaye na Sahi,ise aacha Hume ALVIDA to Keh Dein.


Na he Hum Kisi Ki Dosti ke kabil Hai, Na Dushman ke Kabil Hain,
Na he yahan Humari Jazbaton ki kisi ko Kadar Hai "Tabu"

Aksar Andheka kar ke he woh Humein Jawab kYUN Diya Karte Hain,
Ajnabi he Sahi,Dil se Jawab na dene to,ise aacha Hume ALVIDA to keh Dein.


   
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Re: Khud Ke Liye Maatam Mana Rahi Hu..!!!
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manoj kureel
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Re: Khud Ke Liye Maatam Mana Rahi Hu..!!! - 16th December 2005, 01:25 PM

Hnnnnnn
bahoot ache alfaaz istemaal kiya hai aapne apni gazal mein.,...bas ek ilteza hai,,gazal mein agar radeef-kaafiya ki buniyaat hoti to imaatat-e-gazal aur bhi khubsurat taamir hoti..
meri daad kuboool kijiye
-MANOJ


apne usoolon par ham apne andaaz se chalte hai
karte hai jo "kureel" se gila karte rahein.
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16th December 2005, 01:30 PM

Teh dil se shukriya karti hu apka Manoj jee..

i juz want to ask u one thing..apke kuch alfaz mein samhi nahin...jo aapne likha huva hai ...

"radeef-kaafiya ki buniyaat hoti to imaatat-e-gazal aur bhi khubsurat taamir hoti.."

i dint get d meaing of "radeef-kaafiya" n "imaatat"

jee aapne to mere alfaz ko gazal ka naam de diya.im shocked ke kya meine bhi gazal jaisa likh sakti hu..first of all

i dont know to write shayari..bas alfaz ko jodne ki khosis karti rehti hu..but always in vain...!!!


   
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manoj kureel
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16th December 2005, 01:35 PM

AAPKE LIYE LINK SEND KAR RAHA HOOON...UMEEED HAI AAPKO JAROOOR madad milegi..
"imaarat" se mera matlab gazal se tha,.,,,aur radeef-kaafiya ke baare mein aapko yeh link se maloom chal jayega..
aapke jazbaat abhoot ache hai,,aap bahoot sundar alFAAZ istemaal karti hai,,bas unko gazal ke daayre mein reh likhengi to bahoot sundar rachna ubhar kar saamne aayegi...
take care


http://www.shayri.com/forums/showthr...&threadid=2125

-MANOJ


apne usoolon par ham apne andaaz se chalte hai
karte hai jo "kureel" se gila karte rahein.

Last edited by manoj kureel; 16th December 2005 at 01:38 PM..
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16th December 2005, 01:42 PM

Thanks a lot...Manoj jee...sure i will try my best to write in a gazal format....i m in a learning processes...!!! n once again thanks for ur compliment....!!!

take care...!!!


   
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16th December 2005, 05:05 PM

Monaj jee aap ke diye huve link pe maine gaur farmaya aur

aapne iss opar diye alfaz ko Modify kiya aur dubara likhne ki

khosis kiya ..aur wo modify kar ke dubara post kar rahi hu

aur dubara aapka tah-e-dil se shukriya jo mujko shayari ya

gazal ka kuch knowledge dene ke liye...

aur mujhe last line ko thoda extend he kar diya

mujhe wo chota kar ke likhne nahin aaya ...!!!

=============================================


Apno Ne Nahi,Humein to aksar Gairon Ne Zakhm Diya Karte Hain,
Phir Bhi Chere pe har pal ke liye Tabassum sajaya karte Hain.

Har baar hum to aksar Une hasane Ki Khosis he kiya Karte Hain,
Phir bhi wo humein he aksar kyun gham ka maahol diya karte Hain.

Mana Ke Humein Shabdon Se Khelna ki khosis nahin kiya karte Hain,
Phir bhi jhooti Dosti ke bajaye o ALVIDA kyun nahi keh diya karte Hain.


Hum to Dosti ya dushmani ke kabil nahi,ye soch dil pe laya karte Hain,
Yahan to Humari Jaazbaaton ki kadar koi nahin kiya karte hain "Tabu"

Humko he woh Aksar andheka kar ke kyun Jawab diya karte Hain,
Phir bhi wo ajnabi he sahi,jawab na dena to o baath kyun kiya karte Hain..!



Last edited by ---SwTu-->; 16th December 2005 at 05:10 PM..
   
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16th December 2005, 05:33 PM

muhtarma maafichahunga main kyunki mujhe aapka naam pata nahi hai.par haan aapke khayalat aur aapke kalaam ka dard humare dil ko bahut bhaya.kaafi umda likha hai aapne.aur main umeed karta hoon ki aap bas yunhi likhti rahengi yahan par.

aapka LUCKY



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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

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17th December 2005, 01:26 PM

aap ka bahut bahut shukriya Lucky jee...for correcting me

aap ko pasand ...tah-e-dil se shukriya karti hu

aur shayad mein dubara likhti hu mistake pe gaur farma ke

=============================================


Apne Nahi,Humein to aksar Gair he Zakhm Diya Karte Hain,
Phir Bhi Chere pe har pal ke liye Tabassum sajaya karte Hain.

Har baar hum to aksar Une hasane Ki Khosis he kiya Karte Hain,
Phir bhi wo humein he aksar kyun gham ka maahol diya karte Hain.

Mana Ke Humein Shabdon Se Khelna ki khosis nahin kiya karte Hain,
Phir bhi jhooti Dosti ke bajaye o ALVIDA kyun nahi keh diya karte Hain.


Hum to Dosti ya dushmani ke kabil nahi,ye soch dil pe laya karte Hain,
Yahan to Humari Jaazbaaton ki kadar koi nahin kiya karte hain "Tabu"

Humko he woh Aksar andheka kar ke kyun Jawab diya karte Hain,
Phir bhi wo ajnabi he sahi,jawab na dena to o baath kyun kiya karte Hain..!


   
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