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AN ILLUSION
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Ghazal: Ek diya mayoos sa. -
19th November 2011, 09:49 AM
sdc pariwaar ke sabhee sadasyo ko mera namaskar.apnee ek aur "koshish" lekar aap logo ke saamane haazir hoon.meree ye "koshish" kis had tak ghazal ban payee hai.iska phaisla aapko karna hai. aapkee beshkeemti raay ka intazaar rahega.
Sardiyo'n me'n dhoop khilnaa saa lage.
Tera ghar aanaa bahut achcha lage.
Zulmato'n* ki had huyi raate'n meri,
Har diyaa maayuus saa jaltaa lage.
Aye hawaa aahista chal is baagh me'n,
Phuul Ke paikar* se Ik kaa'ntaa lage.
Chal chale aa baadalo'n Ke paar ham,
Apnii chhat se ye dhanak* rastaa lage.
Shaakh se sab Zard* patte'n gir gaye'n,
Mera daftar bhii mujhe uthataa lage.
WO nahii'n haasil to kuch haasil na ho,
Baato'n se to tuu ufaq bachchaa lage.
#############################
Zulmato'n = darkness
Paikar = body
Dhanak = rainbow
Zard = yellow
Last edited by zainy; 17th July 2014 at 02:57 PM..
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Registered User
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Faisalabad
Rep Power: 34
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19th November 2011, 11:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by uff ak
sdc pariwaar ke sabhee sadasyo ko mera namaskar.apnee ek aur "koshish" lekar aap logo ke saamane haazir hoon.meree ye "koshish" kis had tak ghazal ban payee hai.iska phaisla aapko karna hai. aapkee beshkeemti raay ka intazaar rahega.
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
paekar- body
zulmat- darkness
dhanak- rainbow
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Uff ak Sb Ji............ ! Aap Ki Ghazal Ke Ehsaasaat Pasand Aaye ....... Baqi Aap Mehnat Jari Rakhen Or "BEHR" Ki Taraf Ziada Tawajjo Den....... INSHALLAH Boht Jald Aap Boht Acha Likhnay Lagen Gay......
Sada Khush Rahen Or Likhtay Rahen
Ay Chaara-Saaz Dil Pe M're Daal Ik Nazar
Mujhko Bas Aik Jism Ka Aazaar Hee Nahi
AHMAD ALI SHAKIL
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Banned
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Location: New Delhi
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19th November 2011, 11:10 AM
[QUOTE=uff ak;433271]sdc pariwaar ke sabhee sadasyo ko mera namaskar.apnee ek aur "koshish" lekar aap logo ke saamane haazir hoon.meree ye "koshish" kis had tak ghazal ban payee hai.iska phaisla aapko karna hai. aapkee beshkeemti raay ka intazaar rahega.
-----------------------------------
bahut achi pyaaro ghazal huee hai bhayee meri taraf se mubarakbaad
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
very nice acha matlaa hai...
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
bahut khoob ....... bahut achy daaad
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
bahut khoob ..... kyaa nazuk khyaal hai bhayee.... bahut acha
hawaa dheere chalo.... baho ki jagah acha lage to dekh lena
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
hmmm acha khyaal hai bhayee aur saaf ho saktaa hai...
bahut acha khyaal hai
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
haha... bahut achy kyaa sher hai waah ...
bahut achy... kyaa shayri karte ho yaar ... waaah
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
hmm ise fir se dekhne ki zaroorat hai...
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
acha maqtaa hai bhayee..... .. bas na.... ka wazn jahan tak ho 1 hi lena chahiye ye urdu mai choti awaaz hai.....
isliye ise fir se dekh leN... na ko 1 wazn par hi laye ya iisse bachy
bahut acha lagaa padhnaa... masoom si shayri hai...
dil choo gayeee
Regards
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AN ILLUSION
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Rep Power: 33
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19th November 2011, 05:22 PM
[QUOTE=janumanu;433274]
Quote:
Originally Posted by uff ak
sdc pariwaar ke sabhee sadasyo ko mera namaskar.apnee ek aur "koshish" lekar aap logo ke saamane haazir hoon.meree ye "koshish" kis had tak ghazal ban payee hai.iska phaisla aapko karna hai. aapkee beshkeemti raay ka intazaar rahega.
-----------------------------------
bahut achi pyaaro ghazal huee hai bhayee meri taraf se mubarakbaad
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
very nice acha matlaa hai...
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
bahut khoob ....... bahut achy daaad
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
bahut khoob ..... kyaa nazuk khyaal hai bhayee.... bahut acha
hawaa dheere chalo.... baho ki jagah acha lage to dekh lena
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
hmmm acha khyaal hai bhayee aur saaf ho saktaa hai...
bahut acha khyaal hai
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
haha... bahut achy kyaa sher hai waah ...
bahut achy... kyaa shayri karte ho yaar ... waaah
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
hmm ise fir se dekhne ki zaroorat hai...
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
acha maqtaa hai bhayee..... .. bas na.... ka wazn jahan tak ho 1 hi lena chahiye ye urdu mai choti awaaz hai.....
isliye ise fir se dekh leN... na ko 1 wazn par hi laye ya iisse bachy
bahut acha lagaa padhnaa... masoom si shayri hai...
dil choo gayeee
Regards
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fikr bhai,aadab. kaise hai aap? bhai aapko meree ye "koshish" ek ghazal lagi. mere liye isse badhi baat kuch nahi ho sakatee.bhai, shayri ke field men main bilqul naya khiladee hoon aur mere aas-paas koi bhi aisa nahee hai jisse main apnee "koshisho" par islaah kar saku.bahut accha lagaa jab aapne harek sher ko alag-2 rakhkar EVALUATE kiya.aapse meree ye darkhwaast hai agar mumkin ho sake to aage bhee isee tarahe meree rahnumaee karte rahe.baharahaal bhai,aapne meree"koshisho" ko jis daad o mubaraqbad se nawaja uske liye main aapka shukrgujar hoon.
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RooH Se RooH Tak
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Posts: 1,247
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Delhi
Rep Power: 53
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19th November 2011, 05:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by uff ak
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
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ji bhaut sundar .................................
Radhika
Seene Me Zakham Utarey Chale Gaye
Jo Humpe Guzari Guzarey Chale Gaye
Woh Aayega Ek Din Milne Humse
Naam Uska Hi Pukarey Chale Gaye
E-mail : radhika.nm2@gmail.com
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Anshumali
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: DELHI (INDIA)
Rep Power: 86
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19th November 2011, 07:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by uff ak
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
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WaaH ! BehtreeN !!
AchChhe Aur Khoobsurat Ashaar Kahe HaiN ... !
Umdaa Ghazal Huii .. UFFAK JI !
Mubaaraqbaad !!!
YuuN Besabab Aansoo Aate NahiN
Lag Zaroor Koii Baat Dil Ko Rahii Hai ...
Fareb Kaa ChaDhtaa Bazaar Dekh
Insaaf Se Bastii Khaalii Ho Rahii Hai ...
---Naresh Mehra----
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AN ILLUSION
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20th November 2011, 09:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Radhika_2
ji bhaut sundar .................................
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jee bahut-2 shukriya.......................................... ....................
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AN ILLUSION
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20th November 2011, 09:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by naresh_mehra110
WaaH ! BehtreeN !!
AchChhe Aur Khoobsurat Ashaar Kahe HaiN ... !
Umdaa Ghazal Huii .. UFFAK JI !
Mubaaraqbaad !!!
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namaskar,naresh jee.mujhe khushi hai ki ye "koshish" aapko pasand aayi. daad o mubaraqbad ke liye aapka shukr gujar hoon.
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masttt...
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Location: Chandigarh
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23rd November 2011, 10:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by uff ak
sdc pariwaar ke sabhee sadasyo ko mera namaskar.apnee ek aur "koshish" lekar aap logo ke saamane haazir hoon.meree ye "koshish" kis had tak ghazal ban payee hai.iska phaisla aapko karna hai. aapkee beshkeemti raay ka intazaar rahega.
sardiyo men dhoop khilana sa lage.
tera ghar aana badha accha lage.
zulmato kee had huyi raaten meree,
ek diya mayoos sa ladata lage.
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
rang haatho men pakadane chal diye,
meri chhat se ye dhanak rastaa lage.
zard patte shaakh se girne lage,
mera daftar bhi mujhe uthata lage.
phir abas teri gali men chal diye,
jab gaye humko dikha parda lage.
wo nahi milna to kuch bhi na mile,
baato se to tu UFFAK baccha lage.
paekar- body
zulmat- darkness
dhanak- rainbow
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uffak saheb aadaab,
kaise haiN aap?
aapki ye koshish bahut achhi lagi mujhe....meri jaanib se daad qubuul kijiyega...
'E Taahire Laahuti!!!
Uss Rizk Se Tau Maut Bhali
Jis Rizk Se Aatee Ho
Tere Parwaaz MeiN Kotaahi....
vikramjethi@gmail.com
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~$uper M0der@tor~
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23rd November 2011, 06:46 PM
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
ye sher meraa sabse pasandeedah rahaa... Daad na nazraana qabool karen
Shaad...
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AN ILLUSION
Offline
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Join Date: Oct 2011
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24th November 2011, 01:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by vikramjethi
uffak saheb aadaab,
kaise haiN aap?
aapki ye koshish bahut achhi lagi mujhe....meri jaanib se daad qubuul kijiyega...
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aadaab,bhai sahab.hum to us khuda ke fazal se bahut acche hai.aap kahe aap kaise hain.
mujhe behad khushi hai ki ye koshish aapko raas aayi.aapki daad mere sar maathe.bahut-2 shukriya.
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AN ILLUSION
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24th November 2011, 01:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sameer'shaad'
he hawaa dheere baho ki baag men,
phool ke paekar se ek kanta lage.
ye sher meraa sabse pasandeedah rahaa... Daad na nazraana qabool karen
Shaad...
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namaskar, shaad bhai.aapko is ghazal ka ye sher pasand aaya.ye puree ghazal qaamayaab rahee.aapkee daad ka nazrana mere sar-maathe.bahut-2 shukriya.
reps ke liye bhi bahut-2 shukriya.
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