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Ghazal: 'Sagaaii' |
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(#1)
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madhoSH shaKHs
 
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Ghazal: 'Sagaaii' -
29th April 2003, 08:38 AM
bas, do-teen saaloN ki duurhii rehe gayi.
--- mehfil meiN baiTha tha jab bajjii shenaaii us raat ghair se teri.. maut se meri hui sagaaii us raat uska ghar basaa kar tu bahot khush dikh rahi thi mere har ashq ko dekh kar tu muskuuraaii us raat jin haathoN ko thaam kar tune sajaaya tha dil ko .. unhi haathoN se doli teri sajaaii us raat 'aman' ka yaar bhale bewafa ho gaya yaaroN.. par maut ne apni kasam zaroor nibhaaii us raat --- Aman © "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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(#2)
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29th April 2003, 08:56 AM
Salaam qubool kijiyega 'Ustaad ji', kaise hai aap?
aaj bohat dino baad aaya yaha, aur aate hi aapki behad khoobsurat aur kashish bhari ye ghazal padhne ko mili... jin haathoN ko thaam kar tune sajaaya tha dil ko .. unhi haathoN se doli teri sajaaii us raat waah Aman sahab bohat hi sakht baat keh di aapne is ek hi sher me... Kusoor us shakhs ka bhi tha bohat kuch kisi karan jo kuch bola nahi tha. kuch aisa hi ehsaas hua aapke is sher se... aur phir aapka ye kehna ki 'aman' ka yaar bhale bewafa ho gaya yaaroN.. par maut ne apni kasam zaroor nibhaaii us raat wakai ye sher maut ki wafa se ru-ba-ru karata hai... bohat hi khoob likha hai aapne... muabarakbaad aur shukriya qubool kijiyega... likhte rahiye aur muskuraate rahiye... |
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(#3)
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Just A Lover
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Location: USA, Mississippi
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29th April 2003, 09:18 AM
Aman ji,
bohat hi tarif-e-kabil hai aapki yeh dard bhari ghazal/shayri jo bhi kahiye aap ese...aandaz pasand aaya... humen pata hai aap likhte rahenge... luv, tulsika!~ |
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(#4)
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Registered User
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Location: London
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29th April 2003, 10:57 AM
Aman ji,
Kaise hai aap? Umeed karta huun darust honge.. Aapki yeh nayi Ghazal pari magar isme jazbaat wohi puraane..dard bhare mile.Ik baar fir se dard ka paymaana chalak gaya.. uska ghar basaa kar tu bahot khush dikh rahi thi mere har ashq ko dekh kar tu muskuuraaii us raat Ye sheyr na jaane kyon kisi bedard ki yaad dila gaya.. Aapne achha likha hai..Dard ko bahut hi umda lafzon mein utaar diya hai aapne.. Aise hi Likhte rahiye Varinder chal waha chal jahan tere jaise aur bhi hai... |
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(#5)
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Kadeer ki...
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Location: In Kadeer's heart.... VERY comfortable place!
Rep Power: 27
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29th April 2003, 12:51 PM
Pata nahin kyon aapki ghazleim par kar dard aur khushi dono mehsoos hoti hai.. lafzon mein itna dard, itni bebasi qaid karna aasaan nahin.. shayad hume ye kehne ki zaroorat nahin, par dil mein baat aayi hai to keh hi dete hain, aap bohat hi achhe shayar hain Aman sahab. Dil se ye ghazal likhne ka shukria qubool farmaiye..
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(#6)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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30th April 2003, 06:56 AM
Bedil bhai
kal ki baat ke liye shama kar di jiye.. thoDa 'tUn' ho gaya tha maiN. aur haaN, maiN ustaad kahaaN.. mujhe ustaad kehe kar, asli ustaadoN ko gaali na di jiye! aapka 'ehsaas' pesh karne ka tareeqa achcha lagga bhai.. ghazal pasand farmaane ka shukriya! Dilse ji navaazish, aur waqt ka shukriya qabuul ki jiye! aapko mera likhne ka 'andaaz' pasand aaya, is baat se behad khushii hui! Varinder bhai maiN theek hi huuN dost.. aap sunaaiiye? paimaana to aksar chalakta rehta hai dost, ya woh dard ka ho, ya khushi ka  ghazal pasand farmaaii, ab mera shukriya bhi qabuul farmaaiiye! Banno rani kya haal hai madam? aapko meri ghazaleN paD kar khushii hoti hai, is baat se maiN bhi khushi ke maqaam pe paauNch gaya! waise, lafzoN meiN dard chuphaana zaada mushkil bhi nahiiN hai banno ji.. bas waqt waqt hi baat hai jis taraH mukesh saahab ka gaana hai "maiN pal do pal ka shayar huuN, pal do meri kahaani hai.." waise hi maiN huuN. khair, waqt aur taareef ka dhanyavaad! itni izzat aur mohabbat ke kaaran hi maiN is mehfil meiN aata huuN.. aap sab mera dilii shukriya qabuul ki jiye! "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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(#7)
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Registered User
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30th April 2003, 07:01 AM
Aman sahab,
mujhe uska naam bataiyeh, mai usse zaroor puchoongi ke itne dilchasp aur sanjeedah insan ko satakar use kya mila. gazal bohot acchi thi...is me haqeeqat nazar ati hai. zeba |
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(#8)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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30th April 2003, 07:45 AM
Zeba ji
agar aap unse yeh pucheN ge, to unka jawaab hoga: "woh mere sataane ke kaaran se hi to itna dilchasp banna hai!" haaN, aisa hi kaheN ge woh  behad khushii hui aapka 'jawaab' paD kar.. waqt, aur taareef ka shukriya! aman "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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Hiiiii |
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(#9)
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Registered User
 
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Location: UP, India
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Hiiiii -
30th April 2003, 11:38 AM
Aman Bhai,
kaise hain aap? aaj aapki ghazal padh ke kisi ki yaad taja ho gayi. bahoot badhiya ghazal aapne yaha pesh ki hai. bahoot achchhi lagi sabhi line. Aapka shubhchintak, Akant... आहट सी कोइ आये तो समझ लेना कि तुम हो... AahaT si koi aaye to samajh lena ki tum ho... |
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(#10)
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Kadeer ki...
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Location: In Kadeer's heart.... VERY comfortable place!
Rep Power: 27
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30th April 2003, 11:38 AM
Aman sahab, hum to humesha hi theek thak hote hain.. haan, khushi ki 'levels' badalte rehti hai
 Aur Mukesh sahab ka gaya hua woh gaana to har insaan ki haqeeqat hai.. insaan hai kya? kuchh bhi to nahin.. Dard lafzon main qaid karna mushkil nahin, aur apke kalaam ko waqt aur tarref dena aur bhi aasaan hai! Hum san par karam karein, aur likhte rahien.. |
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(#11)
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Registered User
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Location: Kabaristaan...
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30th April 2003, 11:48 AM
namaste sirkar... yar.. apne bahut hi.. accha likha hai yar... sachi..dard ki ghraai ka pata chalta hai isse... aur apne.. kya .. likha hai ... maut ke sath sagai .. sahi hai yar ....
anywaz.. padh kar. .accha likha .. pata nai chal raha hai .. ke mein kisi line ki tareef karu .. har ..shabd.. tareef ke kabil hai.. bye take care Zindagi Maut ke pehlu mein soo rai hai... Us bewafa se na pucho meri maut ki wajah... Woh to bus zamane ko dikhane ke liye roo rai hai... |
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Kya baat hai |
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(#12)
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PYAASA SHAYAR
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Kya baat hai -
30th April 2003, 11:53 AM
AMAN JI,
Likhna to koi aapse seekhe jazbaaton ko lafzon mein kya dhaala hai aapne . dil ko chu gayi aapki yeh lines 'aman' ka yaar bhale bewafa ho gaya yaaroN.. par maut ne apni kasam zaroor nibhaaii us raat ZINDAGI RAHI TO FIR MILENGE BYE FOR NOW & TAKE CARE iminlovein@yahoo.com APNI LAASH JALAAKAR TERE CHEHRE PAR UJAALA LE AAYENGE ****************************** PHOOL KHILTE HAIN LOG MILTE HAI PATJHAD MEIN JO PHOOL MURJHA JAATE HAIN WOH BAHARON KE AANE SE KHILTE NAHI KUCH LOG EK ROZ JO BICHHAD JAATE HAIN WOH HAZAARON KE AANE SE MILTE NAHI UMRA BHAR CHAHE KOI PUKARA KARE UNKA NAAM WOH FIR NAHI AATE WOH FIR NAHI AATE |
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waah waah |
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(#13)
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Registered User
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Location: California
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waah waah -
30th April 2003, 01:29 PM
mehfil meiN baiTha tha jab bajjii shenaaii us raat
ghair se teri.. maut se meri hui sagaaii us raat uska ghar basaa kar tu bahot khush dikh rahi thi mere har ashq ko dekh kar tu muskuuraaii us raat jin haathoN ko thaam kar tune sajaaya tha dil ko .. unhi haathoN se doli teri sajaaii us raat 'aman' ka yaar bhale bewafa ho gaya yaaroN.. par maut ne apni kasam zaroor nibhaaii us raat achaa likha hai aap nay keep it up neha |
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(#14)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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1st May 2003, 09:26 AM
Akant bhai
maiN theek huuN, aur ummeed hai ki aap mujhse kaii zaada achche houN ge ghazal pasand farmaane ka bahot bahot shukriya! Banno rani ek baar phir se shukriyaa'da karta huuN aapka! =) Tanhai saahab navaazish aur waqt ka mehrbaan huuN maiN! khushi hui jaan kar ki aapko yeh pasand aayi.. shukriya qabuul farmaaiiye Pyaasa ji maiN to bas kabhii-kabaar sharaab ke zariye jazbaatoN ko lafzoN meiN badal daalta huuN.. bahot khush hua aapko yahaaN dekh kar, dhanyavaad! Neha ji ghazal pasand farmaane ka shukriya qabuul ki jiye! ek baar phir se sabka shukriya jo mera hausla baDhaaya! "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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hi |
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(#15)
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Registered User
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Location: New York
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hi -
1st May 2003, 09:23 PM
hi aman kaise ho yaar? aapki ye ghazal...me ghazal hi na paayi jasbaat e dil ki gehrayi bhi paayi...pyaar insaan ko kis had tak majbur aur bebas kar deta hai ye paya...jis shaks ko chahtey hai hum agar vo mil na sake to ek baat hai par if that person have no idea of how u feel..it hurts...can understand ur feelings..har lafz umda hai is ghazal ka aapki tarha.
Priya ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jisnu Lagey, ohi'yo jaane, Kaun Jaane peer parayi! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
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(#16)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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2nd May 2003, 05:40 AM
Priya ji
sahii farmaaya hai aapne.. dukh to waaqaye bahot hota hai =\ waise, waqt, aur taareef dono ka bahot bahot shukriya! behad khushi hui jaan kar ki aapko mere jazbaatoN ka ehsaas hua! shukriya phir se qabuul ki jiye.. aman "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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(#17)
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Nacheej shayra
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Location: india(gujarat)
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2nd May 2003, 07:17 PM
dear amanji,
aapki "sagaii" me to dhum machi hui hai ( i mean to say "aap ki post me"). Aur sahi hai jis andaj me aapne likha hai aur jis tarahse apne lafjo ko sajaya hai...muje to pata hi nahi chal raha me kya likhu. Bas aapke liye ek sher arj karti hu... jaane tuj pe kya kya gujri e dost us raat jaane kiske khun se saji mehdi us raat ab tak ruthi hui hai roshni mekhane se jabse kiya "sharabi" ne andhera us raat keep writing.... urs sanam jo ab ye bewaqt hi tuje satane aa gaye logo ne nahi dekha apne girebaan main aur dekho 'sanam' ko aajmane aa gaye -> SaNaM |
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(#18)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Rep Power: 23
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3rd May 2003, 06:50 AM
meri sanam,
aapko apni sagaaii meiN invitation dena bhool gaya, magar fikr na kariye, aisi sagaaii to sirf sapnoN meiN hoti hai.. asli bhi ho jaaye gi do - teen saaloN meiN aapne dilchasp sher arz kiya hai! sharaabii ne andhera kahaaN kiya hai.. jab tak sharaab hai, tab tak mehfil meiN raushnii bhi rahe gi, bhale meri zindagi meiN na rahe. itni izzat, taareef, aur waqt ka maiN shukr-guzaar huuN! dhanyavaad, aman "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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(#19)
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Registered User
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Location: Bison
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3rd May 2003, 07:20 AM
aman sahab kya kehna. badi hi dukh bhadi ghazal likhi ha aapne.. kya sachai hai isme.. iski kis alfaazo main taareef karo kuch samajh main nahi aa raha hai. bus itna kahuga ke aise hi likhte rahiye aur in naacheezo ko apni shayri aur ghazal padne kaa maukaa dijiye...
'aman' ka yaar bhale bewafa ho gaya yaaroN.. par maut ne apni kasam zaroor nibhaaii us raat shukriya monarch zindagi ki nahi hamare Maghfirat ki dua karna.. ----------------------- |
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(#20)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Rep Power: 23
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3rd May 2003, 09:41 AM
Monarch saahab,
ghazal pasand farmaane ka shukriya qabuul farmaaiiye! jab tak kalam haath meiN hai, tab tak maiN bhi likhta rahuuN ga bhai.. magar, naachiiz aap nahiiN, hum haiN! maiN sach meiN bahot kismat-waala huuN ki aap jaise log meri jazbaatoN ko sarhaate haiN. sach kahuuN to dost, maiN guzar chuka huuN gham se, magar abhi ranj-e-furaavaaN se guzarna baaqi hai. aapka dilii shukriya taareef, aur waqt ka.. aman "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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(#21)
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dhalta hua suraj
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Location: wats in the location. a human can not stay at a place. i am also changing my location day to day
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3rd May 2003, 09:58 PM
aman sahab
bahot khub likha hai aaj pata chala ki shayri kalam se nahi dil se likhi jati hai.. muje to khair ye kehne ki jaroorat nahi ki likhte rahiye fir milenge aaquib Tum nahi pass,koi pass nahi Ab muje jindagi ki koi aas nahi |
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(#22)
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Registered User
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Location: india.
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4th May 2003, 12:06 PM
tumse bichadkar muzase mili thi woh us raat,
tumhari joodaii main khub roii thi woh us raat. tum kahkar be-wafaa use bhul bhi jaoge, apni wafa ki duhaii muze de rahi thi woh us raat. Hello Aman, Khub likha hai......nastar taraashna to koi tumse sikhe. Aur haan ..Sanam ka bhi javaab nahi.....aapki chaavN maie rahegi to uski kalam se bhi dard hi tapkega. paplupopat. |
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(#23)
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madhoSH shaKHs
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4th May 2003, 01:04 PM
Janaab Aaquib,
aapko yahaaN dekh kar khushii hui dost! ghazal pasand farmaane ka shurkiya qabuul ki jiye.. aur haaN, hum bhi yehii ummeed karte haiN ki dohbaara mulaaqat ho! Paplu saahab bahot hi achcha sher likha hai aapne! aur is ghazal paD kar, waqt lagaate hue taareef bhi kar gaye.. baDii mehrbaani aapki.. shukriya! hausla baDhaane ka ek baar phir se dilii shukriya karta huuN! "je tu akhiiyaaN de saamne naii rehnaa, te bibba saada dil moD de..!" kya karooN? aisa hi hooN maiN.. |
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hi |
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(#24)
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kuch likhne ki koshish
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Rep Power: 24
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hi -
4th May 2003, 03:33 PM
kiya kahain sharabi sahab kiya likha hay aap ne
bohat hi dard hay ,,ab is se ziada ham or kiya kahain bas likhte rahiye hamain intizar rahe ga khan banjara''' <mohabbat ka maza to judai main hay> |
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mit jaaye yhe adawton ke silsile tu kia Sawerah |
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(#25)
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Registered User
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Location: usa
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mit jaaye yhe adawton ke silsile tu kia Sawerah -
5th May 2003, 12:53 PM
aap kie shayri wakai hee kabil-e tareef hai
humein paadh kar bohaat achaa lagaa aap key jawaab ka humein intezaar rahegaa Sawerah shayd ke main tum se koi baat karhi loon yhe mottion ke mala tere saath karhi loon jo mere dil main hai mere lafzon ki zuban who hi sughaat tere saath karhi loon yhe peyaar o mohbbat saB hi dard ke silsile hain main tu ek adna si ebbadat tere saath karhi loon eshq o mohbbat main jeet o haar main kia janoon bas itna main aapni maat bhi tere saath karhi loon gar jo tere dil ko baagh kare mere yhe afkaar toe sumjhoon ke yhe enayat tere saath karhi loon main yaadon main aksar jaag kar ay dost raat ko din, din ko raat tere saath karhi loon mit jaaye yhe adawton ke silsile tu kia Sawerah main haseen aapne lamhaat tere saath karhi loon |
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hi |
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(#26)
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Registered User
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Location: coimbatore, india
Rep Power: 22
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hi -
5th May 2003, 08:07 PM
Namaste aman bhai , bura mat maniyega apki is shayri ki taarif ke liye shabd nahi hai mere paas dard ko kitni bekhoobi bayaaN kiya hai apne.
"wah ustad wah" bahut hi khoob lagi apki ye shayri.. likhte rahiyega.. |
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(#27)
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Ishiqka
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Location: toronto
Rep Power: 22
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5th May 2003, 11:28 PM
Aman ji.
aab kahen tho kya kahen. aisa lagta hai aapki shayri parr karr ke aapki taqkdeer jaag utthi hai. maloom nehi kyuin magar aisa mehsoos hota hai. aapne phir se eek baar kamal karti aisi dillagi laga karr shayr se bhi ustad bann gaye. wah! aap aise hi likhte rehega aman ji aur hum intzaar karenge aapki next shayri ka take care Ishiqka p.s maaf karna thodi dher se reply kiya |
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(#28)
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Yaadon ka!
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Location: gujarat-India
Rep Power: 46
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7th March 2008, 02:08 PM
mehfil meiN baiTha tha jab bajjii shenaaii us raat
ghair se teri.. maut se meri hui sagaaii us raat bahut khoob!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mausam Jaane kya samjhi main useN Faasla nazar aaya....Kuch kadmon ke saath se |
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Hmmm!!! |
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(#29)
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kuch likhne ki koshish
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Posts: 930
Join Date: Feb 2003
Rep Power: 24
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Hmmm!!! -
10th March 2008, 02:54 PM
"Abhi to Nikle the Mekhane se teri yad bhula kar
Doston ne cher diya hay phir se tazkara tera" Aj kisi ne is forum ki purani yad taza kar di or bohat se beete hwe musam ankho k samne mehkne lage... kitni hi yadain dosti k phol liye dimagh k darwaze par dastak dene lagi... Thanx Musam ... ye bhi nahi janta k sab dost kaha hon gain...sab kaise hon gain.. mgar umeed hay sab ache hon gain. Banjara"" or kiya???? agar mohabbat hay to judai kiyon or judai main mohabbat kasi???? |
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(#30)
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Yaadon ka!
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Posts: 6,801
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: gujarat-India
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10th March 2008, 03:16 PM
Quote:
jee bilkul durusht farmaya....woh waqt SDC ki history ka golden period tha..par ab sab mahsruf ho gaye haiN..unmein se ek aap bhi haiN...aap bhi kaha yaha aate hain..umeed karte hain aap apna koi naya kalam padhne ka mauka denge.... mausam Jaane kya samjhi main useN Faasla nazar aaya....Kuch kadmon ke saath se |
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(#31)
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kuch likhne ki koshish
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Rep Power: 24
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10th March 2008, 05:11 PM
I will Surely try me best
agar mohabbat hay to judai kiyon or judai main mohabbat kasi???? |
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(#32)
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Moderator
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Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
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17th April 2008, 05:10 PM
Quote:
jane kis dard se guzre hoNge aap us waqt......dard hi dard hai es shayri meiN .....Sunita Thakur..... यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया ....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए... 
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