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Gar yeh Aankhen Kisiki Sifarish na Karti
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Purvi
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Gar yeh Aankhen Kisiki Sifarish na Karti - 24th January 2009, 01:15 PM

Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Dilon.se Mahobbat ki pahechan hoti,
Aur Mohabbat itni aasan na hoti…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Ulfat-e – mohabbat kisi ke didar se na badhti
Dard ki paribhasha roz na badlati
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..


Pyar aur husn ki na koi jang hoti
"Love @ first sight " ki story na banti
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Bewafayi ke kisse sare aam na hote
Aajmayish –e-mohabaat na kabhi rang lati…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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stillalive
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24th January 2009, 07:17 PM

bahut khoob ghazal ji..bahut khoobsurat aandaaz e bayaan aapka hai..khaas tor par ye lines mujhe achi lagi

Pyar aur husn ki na koi jang hoti
"Love @ first sight " ki story na banti
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti


bahut khoob..aise hi likhti rahiye..

god bless u..
keep smiling

vicky..........................
   
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Purvi
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25th January 2009, 08:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by stillalive View Post
bahut khoob ghazal ji..bahut khoobsurat aandaaz e bayaan aapka hai..khaas tor par ye lines mujhe achi lagi

Pyar aur husn ki na koi jang hoti
"Love @ first sight " ki story na banti
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti


bahut khoob..aise hi likhti rahiye..

god bless u..
keep smiling

vicky..........................

Thanks you Vicky...

Aap ko mera likhana pasand aaya jankar bahot accha laga...

koshish karungi ke kuch aur achha likh saku.

Ghazal....


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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sunita thakur
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25th January 2009, 09:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ek Ghazal View Post
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Dilon.se Mahobbat ki pahechan hoti,
Aur Mohabbat itni aasan na hoti…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Ulfat-e – mohabbat kisi ke didar se na badhti
Dard ki paribhasha roz na badlati
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..


Pyar aur husn ki na koi jang hoti
"Love @ first sight " ki story na banti
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Bewafayi ke kisse sare aam na hote
Aajmayish –e-mohabaat na kabhi rang lati…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..



good job Purvi jiii...................................ahsaas acche lage


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


.....Sunita Thakur.....

यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...


   
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26th January 2009, 08:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunita virender View Post
good job Purvi jiii...................................ahsaas acche lage
Sunitaji........


ek koshish ki thi ahsaaso.n ko shabdo.n mein pirone ki.....
aur yeh aapka baddapan hai.. itni kamzor koshish ke bavjjud aap ne hamari hosla afzayi ki hai...... aap ki tahe dil se shukrya guzar hoon....

Isi tarah mera likha huwa padhte rahiyega......

Ghazal..


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Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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Taish
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26th January 2009, 09:59 AM

Purvi jee,

Yakeen maaniye mujhe bahut hi confused kalaam laga ye, ya mujhe samjhne me koi galti hui jo maiN aapke ehsashoN ko samajh nahiN paaya, nahiN to sheroN me aapas me koi connection nahiN dhuNdh paaya maiN, aur Ulfat-emohabbat ka matlab v mujhe samajh nahiN aaya, Mohabbat ki mohabbat se aapka kya kehna hua, maiN ye v nahiN samajh sakaa. Agar kuch jyada keh gaya huNga to aapse maafi ka talabgaar huN...!! Umeed karta huN aage isse bahut behtar kalaam padhne ko mileNge aapki kalam se....!!

Aallah Haafeez....!!



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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish

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Purvi
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26th January 2009, 10:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ghayal_shayar View Post
Purvi jee,

Yakeen maaniye mujhe bahut hi confused kalaam laga ye, ya mujhe samjhne me koi galti hui jo maiN aapke ehsashoN ko samajh nahiN paaya, nahiN to sheroN me aapas me koi connection nahiN dhuNdh paaya maiN, aur Ulfat-emohabbat ka matlab v mujhe samajh nahiN aaya, Mohabbat ki mohabbat se aapka kya kehna hua, maiN ye v nahiN samajh sakaa. Agar kuch jyada keh gaya huNga to aapse maafi ka talabgaar huN...!! Umeed karta huN aage isse bahut behtar kalaam padhne ko mileNge aapki kalam se....!!

Aallah Haafeez....!!
aap ke samaj ne mai koi galti nahi huwi hai...................................... hamari kalam mein woh baat abhi nahi hai... ke aap ki daad mile... ya aap ko samaj aaye....

koshish karungi aaccha likh payun

ghazal


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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Taish
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26th January 2009, 10:20 AM

Aisi baat nahiN hai muhtarma, dard forum me abhi aapne kaafi ahcha likha hai, bas is kalaam me mujhe aapke thoughts bahut confused lage, aur ulfat-e-mohabbat me ye gadbad hui ki mohabbat aur ulfat dono ka matlab ek hi hota hai, aur yahaaN koi professional nahiN hai, chand logoN ke suvaay hum sab shaukiya shayar haiN, aur maiN to shayad sabso chote shayaroN me se huN, par haaN meri ek buri aadat hai ki maiN jhoothi tareef nahiN karta, aur galtiyaaN dikha deta huN, kyuNki mera maan.na hai ki hum yuNhi seekh sakte haiN....!! par iske kaaran mujhe kayi log talkh mizaz bhi kehte haiN. Waise agar koi baat buri lage to ek baar fir maafi ka talbgaar rahuNga...!!

Allaah Haafeez....!!



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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
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----Taish

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Purvi
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26th January 2009, 10:24 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ghayal_shayar View Post
Aisi baat nahiN hai muhtarma, dard forum me abhi aapne kaafi ahcha likha hai, bas is kalaam me mujhe aapke thoughts bahut confused lage, aur ulfat-e-mohabbat me ye gadbad hui ki mohabbat aur ulfat dono ka matlab ek hi hota hai, aur yahaaN koi professional nahiN hai, chand logoN ke suvaay hum sab shaukiya shayar haiN, aur maiN to shayad sabso chote shayaroN me se huN, par haaN meri ek buri aadat hai ki maiN jhoothi tareef nahiN karta, aur galtiyaaN dikha deta huN, kyuNki mera maan.na hai ki hum yuNhi seekh sakte haiN....!! par iske kaaran mujhe kayi log talkh mizaz bhi kehte haiN. Waise agar koi baat buri lage to ek baar fir maafi ka talbgaar rahuNga...!!

Allaah Haafeez....!!
Janab..................

buri lagnewali koi baat nahi hai.... abhi se main bura lagana shuru kar dungi to kaise sikh payungi....??????

aur juthi tarrif se jyada accha hai aap use aur accha banane ke point dikhaye.....

aap ke suzaaw ke liye shukriya.................


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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Diya_Jale
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27th January 2009, 11:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ek Ghazal View Post
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Dilon.se Mahobbat ki pahechan hoti,
Aur Mohabbat itni aasan na hoti…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Ulfat-e – mohabbat kisi ke didar se na badhti
Dard ki paribhasha roz na badlati
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..


Pyar aur husn ki na koi jang hoti
"Love @ first sight " ki story na banti
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..

Bewafayi ke kisse sare aam na hote
Aajmayish –e-mohabaat na kabhi rang lati…
Gar yeh aankhen kisi ki sifarish na karti..
Ghazal ji,
bahot achha laga hume aapka rachna .........dil ko chhu gayi .......youn hi likhte rahiye ....humesha khus rahiye

aapki Diya



Mohabbat ke baad mohabbat mumkin hai faraz.
Magar toot ke chahna sirf ek baar hota hai


Goodbye SDC

Diya
   
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Diya_Jale
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27th January 2009, 11:11 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ghayal_shayar View Post
Purvi jee,

Yakeen maaniye mujhe bahut hi confused kalaam laga ye, ya mujhe samjhne me koi galti hui jo maiN aapke ehsashoN ko samajh nahiN paaya, nahiN to sheroN me aapas me koi connection nahiN dhuNdh paaya maiN, aur Ulfat-emohabbat ka matlab v mujhe samajh nahiN aaya, Mohabbat ki mohabbat se aapka kya kehna hua, maiN ye v nahiN samajh sakaa. Agar kuch jyada keh gaya huNga to aapse maafi ka talabgaar huN...!! Umeed karta huN aage isse bahut behtar kalaam padhne ko mileNge aapki kalam se....!!

Aallah Haafeez....!!
janab Ghayal ji,
Gustakhi keliye muaafi chahati hun.....per itna kahoongi ki ..ehesaas sabka apna apna hota hai....usko gar har koi feel kar pata to lafz ki zaroorat nahin hoti.........ghazal ji new hai SDC mein ....hume unko hosla dena chahiye ...nahin to woh aage jake achhi sayaara kaise banenge...umid hai aap mere baat ko samjhenge


Duao.n ke saath Diya




Mohabbat ke baad mohabbat mumkin hai faraz.
Magar toot ke chahna sirf ek baar hota hai


Goodbye SDC

Diya
   
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Purvi
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27th January 2009, 11:44 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diya_Jale View Post
Ghazal ji,
bahot achha laga hume aapka rachna .........dil ko chhu gayi .......youn hi likhte rahiye ....humesha khus rahiye

aapki Diya
Diyaji....... aapka bahot bahot shukriya....... yunhi hamen padhte rahiye.. aur yakin maniye thode aur bahetar hone ki koshish karti rahungi.......

thanks a lot for your support.....

Ghazal


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27th January 2009, 11:53 AM

Hi Purvi,

I am really sorry but maine aapke kalam se kaafi behtar alfaaz padhe aur dekhe hain...

Ye particular poem mujhe sirf tuk bandi lagi. I dont think this came from ur heart. It was more like its been written for the sake of writing it.. Buck up dear.. Aap bahut hi behtar aur umda shayra hain... Kewal ek sujhaav, Dimaag se nahin dil se likhein. Fir dekhiyega. Kavita khud bolegi



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Taish
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27th January 2009, 06:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diya_Jale View Post
janab Ghayal ji,
Gustakhi keliye muaafi chahati hun.....per itna kahoongi ki ..ehesaas sabka apna apna hota hai....usko gar har koi feel kar pata to lafz ki zaroorat nahin hoti.........ghazal ji new hai SDC mein ....hume unko hosla dena chahiye ...nahin to woh aage jake achhi sayaara kaise banenge...umid hai aap mere baat ko samjhenge


Duao.n ke saath Diya

Diya ji aadaab-o-tasleemaat,

Is baat pe bahut purani behas hui hai, bas itna hi kahunga ki jab tak galtiyaan na bataayi jaayen koi likhna nahi seekh sakta, bas main isiliye unki galtiyoN ko nzrzr me laa raha tha, na main jhoothi wah wahi me vishwas karta huN, na yahaan rishtedaari banaane me, mujhe log talk mizaaz kehte par maine purvee ji ko v kaha ki vo isse behtar likh sakti haiN, bas isme ehsash bahut ulajh gaye the. aap khud hi bataaiye ki ulfat-e-mohabbat ka matlab kya hota hai....?? chaliye newayz no issues agli baar se main reply karne me parhez karuNga.

Allah Hafeez....!!



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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish

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Jab AAnkhe.n kisi ki sifaarish karti hai
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Purvi
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Jab AAnkhe.n kisi ki sifaarish karti hai - 5th March 2009, 10:52 AM

Pyaare Dosto.N


Chand roz pahle is thread par meine kuch pesh kiya tha......... aaj ek baar fir se wohi kavish ko thode changes ke saath aap ke samne rakh rahi hoon..
AAp sabhi ne muje jo bhi suzaav diye the us ke liye mein aap ki shukra guzaar hoon..AAge bhi isi tarah apni raa'ye dete rahiyega............


Jab AAnkhe.n kisi ki sifaarish karti hai
Dil ko dhadhkane ki guzaarish karti hai

Ulzaan-e – mohabbat didar se badhti hai
aansoo.N se dard ki numaaish karti hai

Hus.N ka jadoo jab Ishq par chhata hai
Sunhare khawaabo.N ki khwaahish karti hai

Bewafayi se jab dil zaar-zaar hota hai
Koi nayii Ulfat ki aazmaaish karti hai

Pyaar ka fir ek naya fasana banta hai
‘Ek ghazal’ Banane ki Farmaaish karti hai


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Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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5th March 2009, 11:16 AM

Wow! Ghazal..............tum hamesha surprise karti ho.............bht achcha likha hai(ab to ye tareef ki line repetitive hote jarahi hai).........keep it up!!!!!!!!!
   
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Purvi
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8th March 2009, 10:13 AM

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Originally Posted by N@zneen View Post
Wow! Ghazal..............tum hamesha surprise karti ho.............bht achcha likha hai(ab to ye tareef ki line repetitive hote jarahi hai).........keep it up!!!!!!!!!
Hi Naaz................

Tuhari ek comment bhi kaafi hai mera hosla badhane ke liye............


thanks dear.....


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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Taish
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9th March 2009, 09:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ek Ghazal View Post
Pyaare Dosto.N


Chand roz pahle is thread par meine kuch pesh kiya tha......... aaj ek baar fir se wohi kavish ko thode changes ke saath aap ke samne rakh rahi hoon..
AAp sabhi ne muje jo bhi suzaav diye the us ke liye mein aap ki shukra guzaar hoon..AAge bhi isi tarah apni raa'ye dete rahiyega............


Jab AAnkhe.n kisi ki sifaarish karti hai
Dil ko dhadhkane ki guzaarish karti hai

Ulzaan-e – mohabbat didar se badhti hai
aansoo.N se dard ki numaaish karti hai

Hus.N ka jadoo jab Ishq par chhata hai
Sunhare khawaabo.N ki khwaahish karti hai

Bewafayi se jab dil zaar-zaar hota hai
Koi nayii Ulfat ki aazmaaish karti hai

Pyaar ka fir ek naya fasana banta hai
‘Ek ghazal’ Banane ki Farmaaish karti hai

bahut umda...!! ek kahaani ki tarah ghazal aage badhi hai, pehle mohabbat fir bewafaai aur fir mohabbat, kya baat hai..!! maqta bhi kaafi ahcha tha. matla thoda kamjor laga mujhe par wo waqt ke saath nikharta chala jaayega. bas matle me jo aapne 'dhadkano ko' likha hai use 'dhadkano se' kar dijiye kyuNki guzarish humesha kisi se ki jaati hai kisi ko nahiN. aur saare sher ahcha the, padh kar wakaai mazaa aaya...!! yuNhi mehfil sajaati rahiye....!!



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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish

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Purvi
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9th March 2009, 10:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ghayal_shayar View Post
bahut umda...!! ek kahaani ki tarah ghazal aage badhi hai, pehle mohabbat fir bewafaai aur fir mohabbat, kya baat hai..!! maqta bhi kaafi ahcha tha. matla thoda kamjor laga mujhe par wo waqt ke saath nikharta chala jaayega. bas matle me jo aapne 'dhadkano ko' likha hai use 'dhadkano se' kar dijiye kyuNki guzarish humesha kisi se ki jaati hai kisi ko nahiN. aur saare sher ahcha the, padh kar wakaai mazaa aaya...!! yuNhi mehfil sajaati rahiye....!!
Housla Afzaayii ke liye bahot bahot shukriya.

Abhi to koshish jaari hai aur bahetar likh saku... kabhi kabhi ehsaas hote hai aur alfaas nahi milte.. uperse meri urdu to bahot hee kamzor hai to Waqt to zaroor lagega.

AAp jaise doto.N ki duwa saath rahi to woh bhi ho jayega

AAge bhi meri kalam par aapni raa'ye dete rahiye...Khush rahiye

Purvi


~*~Kaash Dil ki aawaz mein aisa asar ho jaaye
Jise Hum Yaad karte hai use Khabar ho jaaye ~*~
   
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