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~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~*
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Taish
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~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~* - 20th October 2005, 06:37 PM
doston aaj kal dil me khayalat bahut jyada umar rahen hain,bas isi karan kalaam bhi bante hi jaa rahe hain,bas isi kram me is ghayal ka ek aur kalaam,


mere dil ki bas yahi hai ek raza,
ai maut tu ab mere paas aa jaa.

aisa kya gunah kiya maine aakhir,
ki mili mujhe zinda rehne ki saza.

jisse tum pyar karte ho yaaron,
usse bara zalim nahi koi duza.

dil ne mere dhadakna chod diya,
zhakhmon se mera dil yun suza.

is tees ke sang bahut jiya"ghayal",
ab marne ka bhi tu le le maza.


aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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karthik
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20th October 2005, 06:42 PM
well...hope u get those thoughts off ur mind...ne wayss
nice to read but nt as ur thoughts
take care

Karthik
Chaandni mere pyaar ki kyun uspar na rang laayi
Kyun bas kami hi meri ibaadat me usko nazar aayi
Thaa laakh bura sahi main. sacchi meri chaahat thi
Kyun meri bhaavnaon ko woh samajh nahi paayi...

Dekhna chahta hun..
Tere tasveer ko khwab banake dekhna chahta hun
Aur us khwab mein apne aap ko khona chahta hun

I envy the words, which took the form of my emotions
I love my poetry…
Which has turned the tears of pain in to the pearls of love…
   
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Parastaar
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20th October 2005, 07:32 PM
aisa kya gunah kiya maine aakhir,
ki mili mujhe zinda rehne ki saza.

jisse tum pyar karte ho yaaron,
usse bara zalim nahi koi duza.

bahut khuub lucky! bahut gehri baat kahi hai yahan...lekin lucky jo tumne yeh do lafz istemaal kiye hain...'duza' aur 'suza'...yeh sahi nahin hain...asal mein words tau 'duuja' aur 'suuja' hain...phir yeh expression bhi theek nahin laga...

zhakhmon se mera dil yun suza.

dekho dobara se in misron ko likh kar...i'm sure you can make it better...

luv, di

nayi ruton mein wo kuchh aur qareeb aaye
gayi ruton ka sulagataa sa intezaar bhii ho

mere khuloos kaa andaaz ye bhii sachhaa hai
rakhuun na rabt magar dostii shumaar bhii ho

--Sayyidaa Fatimaa Hasan
   
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Taish
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20th October 2005, 08:23 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by karthik
well...hope u get those thoughts off ur mind...ne wayss
nice to read but nt as ur thoughts
take care

thank brother loved 2 know dat u liked the post and thanks i will try 2 come out of those thoughts.keep reading.

urs LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~*
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main_ravi
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Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~* - 21st October 2005, 12:35 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by ghayal_shayar
doston aaj kal dil me khayalat bahut jyada umar rahen hain,bas isi karan kalaam bhi bante hi jaa rahe hain,bas isi kram me is ghayal ka ek aur kalaam,


mere dil ki bas yahi hai ek raza,
ai maut tu ab mere paas aa jaa.

aisa kya gunah kiya maine aakhir,
ki mili mujhe zinda rehne ki saza.

jisse tum pyar karte ho yaaron,
usse bara zalim nahi koi duza.

dil ne mere dhadakna chod diya,
zhakhmon se mera dil yun suza.

is tees ke sang bahut jiya"ghayal",
ab marne ka bhi tu le le maza.


aapka LUCKY


HHHHmmmmmmmmm dard se bhara hua ek jhoka acha hai ki dard bat lete hai par koi koi to dard apne mai hi rakhte hai. achi poem hai.





Main Ravi

Tutna na kabhi tum har kar,
Jiwan to hai ek sangram,
Jise tum jito har DWAR par.
`````````````````````````````
Mera payar kesa anokha,
Parayo ne apnaya,
par, apno ne diya dhokha.

`````````````````````````````
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Taish
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21st October 2005, 05:29 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by Parastaar
aisa kya gunah kiya maine aakhir,
ki mili mujhe zinda rehne ki saza.

jisse tum pyar karte ho yaaron,
usse bara zalim nahi koi duza.

bahut khuub lucky! bahut gehri baat kahi hai yahan...lekin lucky jo tumne yeh do lafz istemaal kiye hain...'duza' aur 'suza'...yeh sahi nahin hain...asal mein words tau 'duuja' aur 'suuja' hain...phir yeh expression bhi theek nahin laga...

zhakhmon se mera dil yun suza.

dekho dobara se in misron ko likh kar...i'm sure you can make it better...

luv, di

dd aapne mujhe meri galtiyan batayi bahut hi ahcha laga.kosish karunga ki aage se phir se aisi galtiyaan na duhraun main.bas dd aap aise hi meri galtiyon ko sudharte rahiye aur hume kya chahiye.

aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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Re: Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~*
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Taish
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Taish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.com
 
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Re: Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~* - 21st October 2005, 05:31 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by main_ravi
HHHHmmmmmmmmm dard se bhara hua ek jhoka acha hai ki dard bat lete hai par koi koi to dard apne mai hi rakhte hai. achi poem hai.





Main Ravi

yaar ravi tumhe pasand aayi ye rachna jaan kar khushi hui mujhe.bas yunhi padhte raho yaar.

aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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kasak
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21st October 2005, 06:45 PM
theek hai....aap jaisa theek samjheiN.....humne to ab bolna hi chhod diya hai.....
thanx,
KasaK.......

~A tease in heart~

Judaa huye haiN bahut log, ek tum bhii sahii,
Ab itnii sii baat pe kyaa zindagii haraam kareiN ..
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Pyarali Rajan
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22nd October 2005, 03:00 PM
Arey Lucky Ji, ees umar mai yeh kya likh diya! Hamari toh yehi prayers hai key aap hamesha khush rahey aur aap ki zindagi khushion sey haribhari rahey!!

Lekin aapki yeh rachna bahot acchi hai! Wah!

Rajan!!

cool
   
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Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~*
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garima
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Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~* - 22nd October 2005, 04:27 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by ghayal_shayar
doston aaj kal dil me khayalat bahut jyada umar rahen hain,bas isi karan kalaam bhi bante hi jaa rahe hain,bas isi kram me is ghayal ka ek aur kalaam,


mere dil ki bas yahi hai ek raza,
ai maut tu ab mere paas aa jaa.

aisa kya gunah kiya maine aakhir,
ki mili mujhe zinda rehne ki saza.

jisse tum pyar karte ho yaaron,
usse bara zalim nahi koi duza.

dil ne mere dhadakna chod diya,
zhakhmon se mera dil yun suza.

is tees ke sang bahut jiya"ghayal",
ab marne ka bhi tu le le maza.


aapka LUCKY:

not fair... kalaam achha hai.. lekin ye kaise khayaal?


take care
didi

Anant se bhi aage... itni si khwahish hai :)
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Taish
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Taish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.com
 
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22nd October 2005, 05:46 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by kasak
theek hai....aap jaisa theek samjheiN.....humne to ab bolna hi chhod diya hai.....
thanx,
KasaK.......

hey hum to bas aapke khayalon me hi theek samajhte hain.chalo koi baat nahi aap aayin aur jawab diya iske liye aapka bahut bahut shukriya.bas yunhi padhte rahiye.


aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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Taish
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22nd October 2005, 05:49 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by Pyarali Rajan
Arey Lucky Ji, ees umar mai yeh kya likh diya! Hamari toh yehi prayers hai key aap hamesha khush rahey aur aap ki zindagi khushion sey haribhari rahey!!

Lekin aapki yeh rachna bahot acchi hai! Wah!

Rajan!!

rajan bhaiya bas dil me kuch aise khayalat aaye aur main likh gaya bas yunhi.bas aapko kalaam pasand aaya jaan kar bahut khushi hui.bas aap yunhi hume padhte rahiye aur hume kya chahiye.

aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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Re: Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~*
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Taish
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Taish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.com
 
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Re: Re: ~*~*MaRnE kA mAzA~*~* - 22nd October 2005, 05:55 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by garima
not fair... kalaam achha hai.. lekin ye kaise khayaal?


take care
didi

are dd koi baat nahi agli baar aisa nahi likhunga itna bhi naraaz mat ho ab humse aap.bas yunhi padhte raho aap.

aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

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hi
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romana
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hi - 22nd October 2005, 06:17 PM
hi

nice poem, nice layout but iske peeche jo khiyaal hai thora strong hai nahi. neway keep on writing
bye

~,ROMANA,~
   
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Re: hi
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Taish
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Taish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.comTaish is the among the best Shayars at Shayri.com
 
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Re: hi - 22nd October 2005, 07:54 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by romana
hi

nice poem, nice layout but iske peeche jo khiyaal hai thora strong hai nahi. neway keep on writing
bye

romana ji ye aapka pehla reply hai mujhe.waise jaan kar ahcha laga ki aapko kalaa, pasand aaya.aur jaisa ki aapne kaha agli baar se strong khayalat pe likhne ki kosish karunga.bas yunhi hume padhte rahiye aap.

aapka LUCKY


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Ishq hota tha, ishq karte haiN,
Vo zamana tha, ye zamana hai...

----Taish
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