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Adhoori Aas
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Re: hi -
9th August 2006, 02:54 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
dilip ji appke ehssas appke alfaaz bhut pyare hote hai.....bass zara technical problem hai app gazal ke kafiye ko samjha karo.....dekho appne likha yeh share......
bhula kar sare dukh jeevan ke, fir jeene ki koshish karta hoon,
shaam dhale ghar me aakar ke, fir til-til karke marta hoon.
is main app kafiye ko barkaraar nahi rakh paye......isko app aise likhte.......
2nd share
shaam dhale aksar ghar aakar til-til karke marta hoon,
bhulke sare dukh jeevan ke jeene ki koshish karta hoon......
'dilip'
is main appka kafiya barkaraar raha........
bura mat manna bass samjhne ki koshish karna......agar bura lage to maaf kar dena........
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raj sahab
aapne apne keemti waqt me se samay nikal kar jo meri madad ki hai uske liye shukriya. aapne sahi kaha mujhe technic nahi aati, sahi mayne main maine abhi tak sirf kavita hee likhi hai, wo to sunita ji ka aagrah tha so maine ye shero- shayri shuru kar di, warna ye sher likhna apne bas me kahan. waise main ye man raha tha ki shayri ka kaifiya ase hona chahiye jaise ki marta, karta, bagerah bagerah
ya khanjar, majar, andar yani milta hua word ya wohi word, chuki mayank sahav ne kaifiya ke liye pahle samajhais dee thi ki kaifiya is per chalna chahiye is liye maine karta ke sath marta ko joda.
jaise paras ji ne 10 july ka massage me kaha hai
"Iss ghazal mein radeef hai Gayaa
Aur kaafiya jo Kunaal (Sachha Pyaar) ke matle ke mutaabiq hai wo hai
Reh, beh, seh, deh, keh vagairah vagairaah…"
isi prakar mayank ji ne 31 july ko kaha hai
ess sher meN kamzor khayaal hai.. aur qaafiYaa bhee nahee hai.. jaise ghar, ham safar, Manzar, hai essi tarh aap ko qaafiya istemaal karna hoga.. eg . aksar, khabar, andar, hunar, , khabar, khanjar, dar, dagar, sehar, safar, guzar..
to maine ye mana ki kafiya isi prakar barkar rakha ja sakta hai,
raj sahab is baat me koi do rai nahi hai ki aapke dwara ki gayi thodi si editing se ye sher padne layak ho gaya hai, per pls kaifiya ke bare main meri jankari abhi adhoori hai. ummid karta hoon aap meri madad karenge or gazal likhne ke kayde ke bare me batayenge.
shukriya
aapka dost
dilip
Last edited by dilip200; 9th August 2006 at 02:57 PM..
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Moderator
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Re: Re: hi -
9th August 2006, 04:02 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by dilip200
roz subha chand saansain lekar jeene ki koshish karta hoon,
jeevan path par thake qadmon se chalne ki koshish karta hoon..
'veer'
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IInd sher
bhula kar sare dukh jeevan ke, fir jeene ki koshish karta hoon,
shaam dhale ghar me aakar ke, fir til-til karke marta hoon.
<< >> [/B][/QUOTE]
3rd share
tere julm-o-sitam sarey bhool ke, phir tumse pyar karti hoon,
nahi hai tu mera apna, fir kyu apna banane ki koshish karti hu.
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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hi -
9th August 2006, 07:57 PM
ajj ke daur main saach kehte ho tum kaise insaa ho,
ordhke chadar jooth ki saach kehne ki koshish karta hoon......
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Moderator
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Re: hi -
10th August 2006, 09:32 AM
4th share
ajj ke daur main saach kehte ho tum kaise insaa ho,
ordhke chadar jooth ki saach kehne ki koshish karta hoon......
'veer'
5th share
kuch kahney se phele mai kudha ko yaad kar leti hoon,
tum mujhe bhool jao mai bhi bhoolne ki koshish karti hoon...
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Adhoori Aas
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Re: hi -
10th August 2006, 09:43 AM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
ajj ke daur main saach kehte ho tum kaise insaa ho,
ordhke chadar jooth ki saach kehne ki koshish karta hoon......
'veer'
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next sher
aas jivan ki toot chuki hai jivan sandhya doob chuki hai
udhar ki chand sanse lekar fir jine ki koshish karta hoon.
<<< >>
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Moderator
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Re: Re: hi -
10th August 2006, 09:48 AM
6th share
aas jivan ki toot chuki hai jivan sandhya doob chuki hai
udhar ki chand sanse lekar fir jine ki koshish karta hoon.
<<<>>
7th share
aise dil na chodo tum na jeevan se naata todoo tum,
abhi waqt hai sambhal jao yehi samjaney ki koshish karti hoon...
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
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hi -
11th August 2006, 06:04 PM
7th share
aise dil na chodo tum na jeevan se naata todoo tum,
abhi waqt hai sambhal jao yehi samjaney ki koshish karti hoon...
-sunita virender
lehron ke sang behte behte khud ko bhool chuka hoon,
pane ko pehchaan apni tanha behne ki koshish karta hoon....
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Moderator
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Re: hi -
14th August 2006, 02:54 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
7th share
aise dil na chodo tum na jeevan se naata todoo tum,
abhi waqt hai sambhal jao yehi samjaney ki koshish karti hoon...
-sunita virender
8th share
lehron ke sang behte behte khud ko bhool chuka hoon,
pane ko pehchaan apni tanha behne ki koshish karta hoon....
'veer'
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yeh gazal to puri ho gaye ab naye shuru kijiye na.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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hi -
14th August 2006, 05:18 PM
dosto ek nai gazal shuru karne ja raha hoon umeed hai app ka saath milega.......
ajj in hawaon main bikhri hai kiski khushboo,
jabki door tak kahin nahi in nighaon main tu........
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Adhoori Aas
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Location: india , shivpuri
Rep Power: 31
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Re: hi -
14th August 2006, 09:01 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
dosto ek nai gazal shuru karne ja raha hoon umeed hai app ka saath milega.......
ajj in hawaon main bikhri hai kiski khushboo,
jabki door tak kahin nahi in nighaon main tu........
'veer'
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CHHA RAHA HAI DIL DIL PE TERI MASTI KA JADOO
NAHI MILI MUJHKO IS JAHAN-O- AASMAN MAIN TU
<<< >>
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Moderator
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Re: Re: hi -
15th August 2006, 02:31 PM
1st share
ajj in hawaon main bikhri hai kiski khushboo,
jabki door tak kahin nahi in nighaon main tu........
'veer'
2nd share
CHHA RAHA HAI DIL DIL PE TERI MASTI KA JADOO
NAHI MILI MUJHKO IS JAHAN-O- AASMAN MAIN TU
<<<>>
3rd share
aaj bhi meri mahki hue sanso mai hai teri hi kushboo,
par na janey ab eh sanam hai kis ki chahhon main tu....
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
Offline
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
15th August 2006, 03:18 PM
3rd share
aaj bhi meri mahki hue sanso mai hai teri hi kushboo,
par na janey ab eh sanam hai kis ki chahhon main tu....
-sunita virender
4th share
tum bhee chup ho main bhee khamosh hoon,
phir bhee humme tumme ho rahi hai guftgoo........
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Moderator
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Re: hi -
16th August 2006, 03:24 PM
3rd share
aaj bhi meri mahki hue sanso mai hai teri hi kushboo,
par na janey ab eh sanam hai kis ki chahhon main tu....
-sunita virender
4th share
tum bhee chup ho main bhee khamosh hoon,
phir bhee humme tumme ho rahi hai guftgoo........
'veer'
5th share
aaj toota hua hai dil begana ho gaya hai mahboob,
eh mere pyar ki manzil ab tujhe mai kaha doondu.....
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Adhoori Aas
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Re: Re: hi -
17th August 2006, 12:21 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by sunita virender
3rd share
aaj bhi meri mahki hue sanso mai hai teri hi kushboo,
par na janey ab eh sanam hai kis ki chahhon main tu....
-sunita virender
4th share
tum bhee chup ho main bhee khamosh hoon,
phir bhee humme tumme ho rahi hai guftgoo........
'veer'
5th share
aaj toota hua hai dil begana ho gaya hai mahboob,
eh mere pyar ki manzil ab tujhe mai kaha doondu.....
-sunita virender
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rajveer sahab ye mera next sher hai. yadi aap ise shamil kare.n to?
jinda rahne ke liye tujhse ek mulaqat chhahta hoon.
e mere mahboob tu hi bata tujhe main kahan miloon.
<<>>
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shayri is my life
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hi -
17th August 2006, 01:22 PM
rajveer sahab ye mera next sher hai. yadi aap ise shamil kare.n to?
jinda rahne ke liye tujhse ek mulaqat chhahta hoon.
e mere mahboob tu hi bata tujhe main kahan miloon.
dilip acha kaha appne.......
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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shayri is my life
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Posts: 1,938
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
17th August 2006, 01:35 PM
rajveer sahab ye mera next sher hai. yadi aap ise shamil kare.n to?
jinda rahne ke liye tujhse ek mulaqat chhahta hoon.
e mere mahboob tu hi bata tujhe main kahan millu.......
6th share
main tere bina pal main sau baar tutta hoon,
mere bina tera kaya haal hai apni suna tu.........
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Re: hi -
17th August 2006, 01:55 PM
6th share
main tere bina pal main sau baar tutta hoon,
mere bina tera kaya haal hai apni suna tu.........
'veer'
7th share
na chahtey hue bhi tumse pyar kar bethi hoon,
mere pyar ki manzil hai kaha yeh batta tu..........
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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hi -
17th August 2006, 02:26 PM
7th share
na chahtey hue bhi tumse pyar kar bethi hoon,
mere pyar ki manzil hai kaha yeh batta tu..........
-sunita virender
8th share
yaha do dil milke dharkte hai wahi manzil hai,
meri nazar se dekh tuje dikhegi manzil har su........
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Moderator
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Posts: 15,199
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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17th August 2006, 03:31 PM
1st share
ajj in hawaon main bikhri hai kiski khushboo,
jabki door tak kahin nahi in nighaon main tu........
'veer'
2nd share
CHHA RAHA HAI DIL DIL PE TERI MASTI KA JADOO
NAHI MILI MUJHKO IS JAHAN-O- AASMAN MAIN TU
<<<>>
3rd share
aaj bhi meri mahki hue sanso mai hai teri hi kushboo,
par na janey ab eh sanam hai kis ki chahhon main tu....
-sunita virender
4th share
tum bhee chup ho main bhee khamosh hoon,
phir bhee humme tumme ho rahi hai guftgoo........
'veer'
5th share
aaj toota hua hai dil begana ho gaya hai mahboob,
eh mere pyar ki manzil ab tujhe mai kaha doondu.....
-sunita virender
6th share
jinda rahne ke liye tujhse ek mulaqat chhahta hoon.
e mere mahboob tu hi bata tujhe main kahan millu.......
7th share
main tere bina pal main sau baar tutta hoon,
mere bina tera kaya haal hai apni suna tu.........
'veer'
8th share
na chahtey hue bhi tumse pyar kar bethi hoon,
mere pyar ki manzil hai kaha yeh batta tu..........
-sunita virender
9th share
yaha do dil milke dharkte hai wahi manzil hai,
meri nazar se dekh tuje dikhegi manzil har su........
'veer'
ligiye yeh gazal bhi puri ho gaye bas jarra galti se 9 share ho gaye. ab naye gazal ki barri hai.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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17th August 2006, 03:35 PM
es gazal ka phele share hai :
1st share
hawa ke jonkey ki tarah aaye aur chaley gaye,
jinhe humne manga tha din raat duaao mai....
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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hi -
17th August 2006, 03:53 PM
1st share
hawa ke jonkey ki tarah aaye aur chaley gaye,
jinhe humne manga tha din raat duaao mai....
-sunita virender
2nd share
kabhi jo is dil ki zeenat hua karte thay,
suna hai ajj wo shumaar ho gaye khudao mai.........
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Adhoori Aas
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Re: hi -
17th August 2006, 04:13 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
1st share
hawa ke jonkey ki tarah aaye aur chaley gaye,
jinhe humne manga tha din raat duaao mai....
-sunita virender
2nd share
kabhi jo is dil ki zeenat hua karte thay,
suna hai ajj wo shumaar ho gaye khudao mai.........
'veer'
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3rd sher
chahne laga tha unhe main rindo ki tarah
per ho na paye shamil wo hatho ki lakeero mai.........
<<< Dilip>>>>
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shayri is my life
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hi -
17th August 2006, 07:22 PM
dilip bhai appko raj ka parnaam.....appne share to acha likha hai lakin kafiye main chuuk gaye ho.....yeh share gazal main shamil nahi hoga.......
3rd sher
chahne laga tha unhe main rindo ki tarah
per ho na paye shamil wo hatho ki lakeero mai.........
<<< Dilip>>>>
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 11:33 AM
2nd share
kabhi jo is dil ki zeenat hua karte thay,
suna hai ajj wo shumaar ho gaye khudao mai.........
'veer'
us waqt phool hi phool khil gaye thy har taraf,
jab tum mujhe milney aaye thy khizzao mai...........
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Adhoori Aas
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Re: Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 12:21 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by sunita virender
2nd share
kabhi jo is dil ki zeenat hua karte thay,
suna hai ajj wo shumaar ho gaye khudao mai.........
'veer'
us waqt phool hi phool khil gaye thy har taraf,
jab tum mujhe milney aaye thy khizzao mai...........
-sunita virender
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4th share
chahne laga tha unhe main rindo ki tarah
per ho na paye shamil wo mere kudaao mai.........
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Moderator
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Re: Re: Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 03:15 PM
4th share
chahne laga tha unhe main rindo ki tarah
per ho na paye shamil wo mere kudaao mai.........
"dilip"
5th share
tuney pyar se humey chu liya kuch es tarah,
ek nasha sa sha gaya en fizzaoo mai............
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Adhoori Aas
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Re: Re: Re: Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 03:28 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by sunita virender
4th share
chahne laga tha unhe main rindo ki tarah
per ho na paye shamil wo mere kudaao mai.........
"dilip"
5th share
tuney pyar se humey chu liya kuch es tarah,
ek nasha sa sha gaya en fizzaoo mai............
-sunita virender
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6th share
abki jo tum mile to bichdne na doonga..
ek ajeeb sa nasha hai tumhari in adaao mai......
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Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 03:58 PM
6th share
abki jo tum mile to bichdne na doonga..
ek ajeeb sa nasha hai tumhari in adaao mai......
'dilip'
7th share
tere aane ka ahsaas phele hi ho jatta hai humey,
ek kuhsboo se samma jatti hai en hawaao mai......
-sunita virender
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.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
18th August 2006, 05:22 PM
7th share
tere aane ka ahsaas phele hi ho jatta hai humey,
ek kuhsboo se samma jatti hai en hawaao mai......
-sunita virender
tere dar pe khud jhuk jata hai mera sar,
itni to wafa ajj bhee hai hum bewaffaoo mai......
'veer'
lijiye sunita ji yeh gazal bhee poori ho gai......
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Moderator
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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Re: hi -
18th August 2006, 05:27 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
7th share
tere aane ka ahsaas phele hi ho jatta hai humey,
ek kuhsboo se samma jatti hai en hawaao mai......
-sunita virender
8th share
tere dar pe khud jhuk jata hai mera sar,
itni to wafa ajj bhee hai hum bewaffaoo mai......
'veer'
lijiye sunita ji yeh gazal bhee poori ho gai......
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raj ji yeh gazal bhi puri ho gaye hai ab app naye gazal shuru kijiye.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
Offline
Posts: 1,938
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
18th August 2006, 05:33 PM
chalo nai gazal shuru karte hai.....
1st share
kabhi mushkil to kabhi aasa hai zindagi ka safar,
aandhiyon main jalta diya hai zindagi ka safar.......
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Adhoori Aas
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Posts: 1,543
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: india , shivpuri
Rep Power: 31
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Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 10:29 AM
1st share
kabhi mushkil to kabhi aasa hai zindagi ka safar,
aandhiyon main jalta diya hai zindagi ka safar.......
'veer' [/B][/QUOTE]
jabse tu chala hai sath mere humsafar bankar
badi aasani se guzar gaya hai zindgi ka safar...........
<<<>>>>
Raj sahab ye thik hai?
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shayri is my life
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Posts: 1,938
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
19th August 2006, 10:47 AM
2nd share
jabse tu chala hai sath mere humsafar bankar
badi aasani se guzar raha hai zindgi ka safar...........
<<<>>>>
3rd share
parwana hoon main haske jalna meri aadat hai,
mere liye teri mehfil ki shama hai zindagi ka safar.......
'veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Adhoori Aas
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Posts: 1,543
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: india , shivpuri
Rep Power: 31
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Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 11:00 AM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
2nd share
jabse tu chala hai sath mere humsafar bankar
badi aasani se guzar raha hai zindgi ka safar...........
<<<>>>>
3rd share
parwana hoon main haske jalna meri aadat hai,
mere liye teri mehfil ki shama hai zindagi ka safar.......
'veer'
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4th share
khak me mil jayegi jindgi gar tu chali gayi
bin tere mushkil guzarna hai jindgi ka safar......
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Moderator
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Posts: 15,199
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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Re: Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 11:07 AM
4th share
khak me mil jayegi jindgi gar tu chali gayi
bin tere mushkil guzarna hai jindgi ka safar......
'dilip'
5th share
jab se meri zindgi mai aaye ho tum zindgi bankar,
tab se aur bhi haseen lagney lagga zindgi ka safar,
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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shayri is my life
Offline
Posts: 1,938
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Punjab(Phagwara)Now:(California) USA
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
19th August 2006, 11:09 AM
4th share
khak me mil jayegi jindgi gar tu chali gayi
bin tere mushkil guzarna hai jindgi ka safar......
'dilip'
5th share
jab se bass gaya wo is dil mai dharkan banke,
musalsal khushiyon ka silsila hai zindagi ka safar......
,veer'
un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Adhoori Aas
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Posts: 1,543
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: india , shivpuri
Rep Power: 31
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Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 11:34 AM
Quote:
Originally posted by rajveeer
4th share
khak me mil jayegi jindgi gar tu chali gayi
bin tere mushkil guzarna hai jindgi ka safar......
'dilip'
5th share
jab se meri zindgi mai aaye ho tum zindgi bankar,
tab se aur bhi haseen lagney lagga zindgi ka safar,
-sunita virender
6th share
jab se bass gaya wo is dil mai dharkan banke,
musalsal khushiyon ka silsila hai zindagi ka safar......
,veer'
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7 th share.
khone laga hai hosh abto bahke hain kadam
wabadstoor magar jari raha hai jindgi ka safar........
<< dilip>>>
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Moderator
Offline
Posts: 15,199
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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Re: Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 12:10 PM
7 th share.
khone laga hai hosh abto bahke hain kadam
wabadstoor magar jari raha hai jindgi ka safar........
<< dilip>>>
8th share
kush bahut hu mai teri jivan-saathi ban kar,
ab to lamha lamha janat hai zindgi ka safar.....
-sunita virender
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Moderator
Offline
Posts: 15,199
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Chandigarh (Mohali)
Rep Power: 63
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19th August 2006, 12:11 PM
gazal puri ho gaye hai ab naye shuruaat kijiye.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Adhoori Aas
Offline
Posts: 1,543
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: india , shivpuri
Rep Power: 31
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Re: Re: Re: hi -
19th August 2006, 12:52 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by sunita virender
7 th share.
khone laga hai hosh abto bahke hain kadam
wabadstoor magar jari raha hai jindgi ka safar........
<< dilip>>>
8th share
kush bahut hu mai teri jivan-saathi ban kar,
ab to lamha lamha janat hai zindgi ka safar.....
-sunita virender
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didi aapne is gazal me is last sher ko jod kar ek nayi disha de di
bahu badiya.
aapke is antim sher per meri daad kabool karo.
dilip
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